Soul Asylum - Chapter 11

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Sharifah tried to stand her ground but it was hard with the wind blowing strongly trying to push her closer to the cliff. Rafiq seemed unfazed by the wind.

 

            “What’s going on Rafiq?” shouted Sharifah against the loud booming of thunder and lightning. The cloud was darker and darker. Sharifah looked behind and saw that the bight sunshine place that she had fell into was getting distant.

 

            “I’m going home. I’m going to see Mak, Abah and Rozita forever. We’ll be happy just like we should be,” said Rafiq softly. The words seems to be entwine with the wind as the words seem to be floating everywhere.

 

 

            Home? What was he talking about ? Forever??

The winds was pushing strongly behind her , her feet moved forward controlled by the wind even though she was trying to move against it. She found herself  standing behind Rafiq. Sharifah could see everything clearly, the dark rough sea rising higher, she could feel the spray of water on her as the waves crashed on the bolder below the cliff. Rafiq was already soaked wet. He turned back to Sharifah and she could see him smiling happily.

 

            ‘Their calling me,” said Rafiq. Sharifah listened but she couldn’t hear anything. She could see that Rafiq was standing dangerously close to the edge of the cliff. Somehow this dream she was having was getting too real. She didn’t want to see what will happen if Rafiq jumped off the cliff..

 

 

                 OooOOoo. Sharifah looked up and saw that the owl had shifted to another tree nearer to them. It was pacing restlessly on its branch. Rafiq moved further the edge.

 

     “Wait!” screamed Sharifah, but Rafiq ignored hr this time and was about to step off the edge. Sharifah knew that had to take desperate measures. Without thinking she grabbed Rafiq’s waist and with all her strength pulled the big sized man from the cliff. Surprisingly the strong wind  that had pushed her to the cliff did not disturb them. Sharifah fell backwards with RAfiq thumbling on top of her.

 

  Sharifah groaned and looked at the heavy wait on her stomach. It was laughable that they were in the same position when they first met except that it was Sharifah that had fell on top of Rafiq.

Rafiq got up with a huff. His eyes blazing with anger. Sharifah tried to get up but was pushed down angrily by Rafiq.

 

     “What do you think your doing?” shouted Rafiq. Sharifah laid there looking up at the pale young man.

 

     “What made you sure that you will see them? What made you so sure that they will be happy to see you?”

 

Rafiq laughed as if she was a stupid girl.

 

    “Didn’t you see how they treated me? How they love me,” said Rafiq harshly. Sharifah looked at the angry young man. He really didn’t know his situation did he? One moment he was telling his life story –his true life story and the next he was going to the event occurring in the hospital ward, where his parents treated him differently- an event that his mind created for him as a form of relief from the pain that he was facing. Sharifah couldn’t help feeling sorry for him. Was that the only feeling that she had for him?

 

     Sharifah got up slowly as Rafiq turned towards the beckoning cliff.

 

     “Rafiq, your not dead. Not yet you know. Yur in a coma, laying in a hospital bed. You’ve been that way for almost a month now. None of this is true. It’ ust in your hea; Rozita….. your mother….your father. You just made them up,” said Sharifah . Her clothes was now wet from the spree from the increasing waves hitting the rcks below.

 

     “If I die, I can see them again,” argued Rafiq.

 

     “What guarantees that you would see them? What guarantees that your parents will be kind to you when they were never that way when they were alive,” said Sharifah finding strength , from her own words. She could sense that Rafiq was faltering. She only needed him to move away from the cliff. If he jumped, she didn’t want to think what will happen to her. Will she be trapped with him? Somehow the two of them was linked and with all her problems and self-consciousness that she as facing now, she didn’t want to be trapped in a fantasy.

 

     Rafiq didn’t say anything, for a moment Sharifah I’m in a coma now. I’ve known that f some time One moment I’m with my parents; the next I’m hearing voices from a distance and sometimes I can see this fuzzy, blurry images around me. Figures in white.”

 

     “This means your recovering. All you have to do is to wake up,” said Sharifah excitedly.

 

     “I dn’t want to. I want to stay here with them,” said Rafiq sorrowfully. He moved hi left foot back t the previous position, dangerously close to the cliff. He was fighting. Damn! Sharifah kicked the gound roughly. This was frustrating.

 

     “Bodoh, you know that. Your stupid, selfish jerk,” said Sharifah angrily. Surprised by her outburst, Rafiq stood stiffly. He didn’t turn nor did he move any further in front. Sharifah grabbed his rm and turned him towards her.

 

     “Do you know why you keep having the same images in the train.? Because you can’t let go. The baby in the mother’s womb – your leeching on to your past, absorbing it as if it is you destiny..The boy in one the cards- it was you, you were scared and lonely and that’s why you were hiding in the shadows, you didn’t want anyone o find you The image o the grave – it’s your grave, you’ve been having this mindset that you want to die, you deserve to die. These images been trying to tell you something but you ignored them and YOU,” said Sharifah pointing to the owl who was watching them with interest at the turn of event and was a little taken back when she pointed at it.

 

     “I still haven’t figured you out, yet,” hissed Sharifah. Rafiq was looking at his arm. It felt warm from her touch. “I’m trapped here with you and I so don’t want to be here.” She held harder to his arm even though he didn’t ddint make any move.

 

     “And you know what? I would rather go back to my life, take my exams and for once I’m not worried that I might bungle up my life. I am so jealous of you,” said Sharifah harshly.

 

All this time while she was talking, Rafiq didn’t look at her but when she said she was jealous, he looked up;  confusion was written all over his face. Sharifah looked hard back at him.

 

     “Do you know that your aunts and uncles have been here for you ever since you were in a coma. Aida’s been crying her heart out; between your parents and your relatives. I would rather take the living any time than the dead.”

 

Rfiq just kept quiet but Sharifah knew that some o her words had got into him. She realized that she was still holding on to his arm – an quiet a strong and muscular arm. Sharifah blushed at the thought even though she was supposed to be cross with him. She was about to release it when she heard a loud squawk.

Both of them looked up and saw the owl spread its wings and launched itself off the branch it was resting on and flew towards the two of them.

            Sharifah didn’t know whether it was her imagination or it was the place but she could have sworn the bird grew double its size as it flew towards the two of them. It didn’t stop or lessen it’s speed. It’s wing spread wider.

            The two of them dodge as the bird swoop down on them. Rafiq tried to back away fron the bird and forgot that he was inches from the edge of the cliff. He lost his footing and wildly grabbed Ssharifah as he lost his balance and fell backwards off the cliff.

Rafiq’s heavy weight was too much for Sharifah to sustained and she , herself was pulled off the cliff, down to the treacherous rocks below. Sharifah led out a piercing scream…..

Continue Chapter 10

“So what happen after that?” asked Michael listening to Aida. She kept quiet and leaned forward in her chair. She touched Rafiq’s hand.

 

     “His parents died on the spot. The car spin out of control and hit the  tree. It was the father’s side that had direct impact. He was nearly flung out of the car, save for the seat belt; inspection showed that the seat belt was nearly thorn from its safety casing. The passenger seat at the back was a mangled. Rozita died on the way to the hospital. Rafiq…it was a miracle that he survived. He got out of the accident with a bump on the head and a bruised chest. After the incident he changed,” said Aida sorrowfully.

            “How did he change?” asked Michael.

            “He was quiet and he kept to himself most of the time. He became short tempered and shouted at anyone who tried to help him. I was always shouted at. I just wanted to help. He didn’t want to talk, He just bottled everything inside. He became destructive. He had some friends in Seremban who knows about motorcycles, he sometimes travel down and bought himself a bike. He like to do dangerous stunts on his motorcycle. He became one of those Mat- Rempit. Our Rafiq, who was once well-mannered, intelligent and funny now loves to race illegally at the highway. Accidents and injuries were normal; he would just wave it of as if he loves the feeling of pain. He drinks, you know. He would have never gone near that stuff before. He didn’t get a job, he was ruining himself. Thank god he wasn’t into women. He kept away from us, he wasn’t rude to the elders but he didn’t listen also and soon we got tired of trying to talk some sense into him. We left him alone. None of us heard any news until he got into another accident.” Aida sighed and leaned back on her chair. She looked tired. Michael gently touched her shoulder gently.

 

            “You really liked him,” he spoke softly. Aida gave a nervous laugh.

            “Yes, I was crazily jealous when I found out that Sharifah had visited him by herself. I was never good at hiding my feelings. I didn’t agree when he wanted to get engaged to Rozita. I didn’t think that she was good for him but I relented when I saw how happy she made him. Now that she’s gone, I don’t want any woman beside him. Stupid isn’t it. Cost me my friendship with Sharifah.” Michael kept quiet. Rafiq was one lucky guy to have women falling for him. There was a loud beeping on the heat monitor. The images were moving rapidly and showing rapid spikes. Rafiq’s body was shaking aggressively. Michael jumped to his feet and pushed Aida to the side. RAfiq’s eyes were close but he was shaking so hard that his body was pushed upwards as if someone had given him an electric shock. Michael shouted a command and nurses rushed to his side.

           

            “He’s having a seizure,” shouted Michael to no one in particular. Michael was trying to push him down so that he won’t rip the drip on his hand and the tubes placed on his nose and abdomen. A nurse pulled Aida out of the ICU.

 

            “What’s going on?” asked Aida shakily. She could still hear the machine beeping alarmingly loud as she went out of the room.

 

            “He’s having another seizure, don’t worry we’ll do everything for him,” said the nurse as she accompanied Aida uptil the entrance to the ICU. Aida watched with watery eyes as the door closed behind the nurse as she rushed back to Michael. Aida went to the bench outside the ICU and sat on it keeping a watchful eye on the door. She nearly jumped out of her skin when the handset in her left hand rang. In his rush, Michael had gave Aida his handset to hold for him. Aida ignored the ring for a while but it kept ringing, it wouldn’t stop. Aida thought f switching it off but on a second thought it could be something important for the doctor. Hastily she answered.

 

            “Michael, something’s wrong with Sharifah!” screamed the hysterical voice on the other side. Aida looked the Nokia hand phone worriedly.

 

            “Sofia?” asked Aida recognizing the voice.

 

            “Aida? What are you doing there?”

 

            “I’m at the hospital. The doctor is attending to Rafiq. He had another seizure. What’s wrong?” asked Aida gently. No matter how angry she was with Sharifah, she was still her friend and from Sofia’s voice something was wrong.

 

            “She’s burning up. I already wet a towel to reduce the temperature but she’s s hot and she’s delirious. Her lips are dry and she’s sweating a lot. Her face is red. Please call Michael,” said Sofia trembling.

 

 

            “Ok don’t panic. Have you wrap her up?”

            “Yes with a thick blanket.”

            “Find a thin blanket and wrap her we want to keep her warm but with the high fever its better to loosen up since we don’t want to boil her there. Get some ice, put it on the towel and wrap it. Gently run it over her forehead, it can help to reduce the fever. Try to wet her lips or put a teaspoon of water into her mouth. She’s probably dehydrated. Give me a call if theres anything wrong,” said Aida trying to sooth Sofia.

 

            “Got it,” said Sofia relieved that she can do something to help her friend . “ Oh and …..Aida”

 

            “Ya”

            “Thank you, from myself and also on behalf of Sharifah.” Aida kept quiet and after saying goodbye she hang up the phone. Aida looked at her watch. 5.20 she had been outside for 20 minutes. What was going on here….

 

 

 

 

Soul asylum chapter 10

Chapter 10

“Oh boy,” was  the only word that came out. It was as if the world had been split into two. Her side was bright and cheerful while the other side which she was facing was raging red. The ground was black and it narrowed like a pathway heading towards a cliff about a few meters from her. The sky was covered with black clouds and lightning was flashing everywhere. Black dead trees were growing along the path. There was something eerie about the place. So much anger. Sharifah could see a figure at the edge of the cliff. A man. He didn’t look at her, he was staring downwards. Sharifah could hear the sound of waves, they were loud as if the ocean was angry and waves were hitting below with vengeance. Sharifah didn’t want to go to the figure but her feet seemed like it has a life of its own. Without her consent it walked up to the figure. Sharifah stopped a few meters from the figure. The wind was blowing stronger this time. Sharifah could see the horizon in front of the figure, there was no sun, no birds but only the flashes of lightning and dark raging sea which seems to raise higher and higher. Sharifah was scared, and the smell of kemenyan; so strong that Sharifah could hardly breath.

 

     “Rafiq?” cried huskily trying to stifle a cough. The kemenyan scent was getting stronger. The figure turned to face her. Sharifah could feel the salt water spree from the raging waves almost blinding her. Distracted, she wiped her eyes with her hand and looked up at Rafiq; she gasped and took a step back. He didn’t look like the unconscious man lying on the hospital bed 

He looked  so pale almost to the point of translucent, there were dark rings around his eyes, his lips were purple and his body was haggard. He was like a man who had given up all hope, waiting for his solace. Even though her brain was giving signals to her synapse not to move forward; her instinct urged her to go to him.

 

     “What is this place?” asked Sharifah gesturing her. Rafiq didn’t answer.

 

     “Why are you here?” asked Rafiq.

 

     “You tell me. I didn’t volunteer myself to be in your dreams,” said Sharifah. “Why is your dream sequence different. Why aren’t we in the train?’

 

     “I didn’t ask you to come here. You can go now,” said  Rafiq harshly turning to the edge. Sharifah felt angry at the brush off and turned towards the area where she had fell from and walked quickly towards it.

 

     Bump! Sharifah fell on her butt. Okay that hurt!  She tried to stretch her right foot forward but it hit something solid, something that couldn’t be seen and wasn’t there the first time. She got to her feet and reached her hands forward. She could something hard in front. She tried to push it but it was like pushing a brick wall. It was a WALL!An invincible wall! Sharifah looed helplessly at the bright sunny place that she had came from. She was so angry, why was this BOY playing with her!

 

     “Cakap orang boleh pergi,” said Sharifah in direct Malay. “What’s the big deal!”

     “Apa ni?”

Rafiq turned towards her angrily disturbed by her interference.

 

     “Can’t a guy die in peace!” he said heatedly, looking upwards hoping that the lightning would strike him.

 

     “Why do you want to die? You can just wake up if you want to. Your in a coma for goodness sake. Everybody is waiting for you,” said Sharifah confused. None of this was making any sense. Why was she there? Why was he doing this? Why is it so weird there?

 

     “Will you stop it!” cried Rafiq as if he could read her mind. The next thing happen so fast, it happen at a blink f an eye. One minute he was standing at the edge, the next he was standing right in front of her, gripping both hands to her collar.

 

     “I don’t have all the answers to your question, ok. I don’t know why you are here. It’s just that you keep appearing in my head like a leech,” he hissed. Sharifah could smell the fowl scent of his breath. He loosened his grip and turned back to the edge.

 

     “All I want is to be with Rozita and my parents.” Sharifah tried to adjust from the fowl smell.

 

     “You think this will bring them all back. What make you so sure that you will see them if you give up?” Rafiq didn’t say anything. He didn’t respond to her.

 

This didn’t look  good. Even if Rafiq has made his mind , the problem was that Sharifah will be trapped with him. Where ever they were, that place didn’t want her to leave. She heard a rustling sound and looked up at one of the dark dead tree near her. An owl looked back down at her. Its eyes big and round, its head tilted at one side as if studying her. Sharifah looked at the owl, its big round eyes were gentle. It looked from Sharifah to Rafiq and then back to her. Sharifah frowned, was the owl trying to tell her something?

What did that owl mean? It appeared in all the dreams that she was in? Did it have any significance? Sharifah rubbed her neck, trying to find a way out of this. Owls normally resembled wisdom but then from what she saw in Malay dramas (shockingly she did watched them!) they also can see the after life and follow wondering spirits that couldn’t find peace. Was there someone there with them?

 

                 “What happened Rafiq?” asked Sharifah. At first he didn’t respond then he shrugged his shoulder.

 

“Have you killed anyone?” asked Rafiq. Sharifah was surprised by the question.

 

“No.”

Rafiq turned back towards her. He gave her a sad smile. There was so much pain in his eyes and they were weld with tears that didn’t trickle out for a long time.

 

            “I have. Twice…My brother the first time, my parents and Rozita the second time,” he said taking a deep breath. Sharifah remembered the scenes that she saw when she fell down the endless tunnel there was no sign of a brother.

 

As if reading her mind, Raiq started his story…

 

            He was adopted by a middle class couple. They had tried for several years to bear their own child to no success. They had agreed t adopt him, a baby whose parents died in a car accident. They had flowered him with presents and love. They were a happy family, him his father and mother. But things changed after that, 4 years later his mother found that she was pregnant. His father and mother was ecstatic. His father was more concern for hi wife and the growing bulge on he stomach. Their attention was for the growing thing in her stomach. They didn’t abandon him, they still love him but it wasn’t the same. The day finally came when his mother was in labor. He stayed with his grandparents as his father drove his mother to the hospital. His father called his grandparents that night to inform the good news that his mother had given birth to a healthy baby boy. His grandparents was happy, he remembered his grandmother hugging him and saying that he was a big brother now. His parents stayed at the hospital the following day.

Rafiq waited at the door for his parents as his mother was discharged the following night. He saw their green proton saga pulled into the driveway. His parents came out of the car and walked into the house. They were greeted by his excited grandparents. His mother passed him carrying the bundle of joy, while his father ruffled his hair and stepped into the house. There was no kiss or a heave on top of his father’s shoulder. Rafiq looked on as the whole family gathered into the living room, his aunties and uncles were there and everyone wanted to see the baby. He just looked on with big round eyes, alone at the door way, nobody even looked at him. It was his grandfather that pulled him to the happy group and put his hand on his shoulder. Rafiq looked at the mall figure wrapped in the bundle. How he distaste the  creature.

 

From then onwards the baby was the center of his parents’ attention. He wasn’t the precious baby anymore. His mother stayed at his grandparents for a month to recover from the birth and the baby stayed at her side all the time. His father every time he came back from work would rush to is mother’s room and didn’t play ball with him anymore. It was his grandfather who played with him. Everyday his jealousy for the baby grew. He would go near his mother pretending to look at the baby and then he would hit him on the head. How the baby would scream. His mother would pinch his arm until he cried and pulled him out of the room.

 

It was on a Monday morning, his grandparents went to the surau for Quran class. His mother was in the toilet. Rafiq went to the bed where the baby was laying. The baby was looking up the ceiling. It turned its head towards Rafiq when he approached the bed. It looked at him with its big round eyes, a small smile cropped at the side of its lips. Rafiq’s anger grew, what was it looking at him for? He hated looking at the baby. He took the baby’s small towel near his pillow and without thinking put it on the baby’s face. He didn’t know the consequence of his action. How could he have known? He was only four year old angry little boy who wanted his parents’ attention back. Rafiq left the room. Not long after that he heard a piercing scream from his mother. He rushed into the room and saw his mother cuddling the baby, crying and screaming at the same time. The following hours were a blur. His mother rushed to the hospital, doctors and nurses surrounded the baby. Rafiq sat on the big  cold bench looking without blinking as the doctors worked desperately to revive the little baby.. His grandparents and his father rushed to the hospital. Father was hugging mother tightly. He saw his father crying, the little boy watched as a doctor approached them. Both his parents looked at the doctor desperately…hopingly. Rafiq watched as his mother crumbled to the floor. His father grabbed her and pulled her towards him, his mother was screaming again but this time his father was silent, just holding her. What Rafi q couldn’t forget how his father looked at him. There was no love in those eyes only coldness…

 

The police classified the case as an accident. He was too young to know the consequences of his action. His parents along with him were advised to go for counseling. Did he feel guilty? At that time he didn’t feel anything but he knew that things had changed and it would never be the same.

 

His parents distant themselves from him. Whenever they talked to him they didn’t look directly at him nor did they called his name as if he was a third person. That didn’t hurt, what hurt him the most was the way they looked at him, there was no loving gaze instead they look at him  as if he was a stranger, as if he was the cause of their baby’s death. Rafiq was too  young to understand  what his parents was going through and as he grew up they didn’t let him forget what he had done nor did they forgive him; and as the years passed they sowed the feeling of guilt and self consciousness in Rafiq.

 

What he knew was that he needed his parents dearly and no matter how he tried, they weren’t please with him, they would always be haunted by the past and they had imprinted in his brain the guilt because of him that their baby was dead no matter, that was a burden that Rafiq had carried through out his life. What he knew was that he needed his parents dearly and no matter how he tried, they weren’t please with him, they would always be haunted by the lie and they had imprinted in his brain the guilt that if because of him that their baby was dead no matter how unfair t sounded but that was a burden that Rafiq had carried through out his life. His  grandparents and his relatives were a god sent. They weren’t prejudice towards him and tried to bridge the hole that he felt from his parents but it wasn’t enough.His grandparents and his relatives were a god sent. They weren’t prejudice towards him and tried to bridge the hole that he felt from his parents but it wasn’t enough.

 

It was when he entered secondary school that he met Rozita.  Pretty Rozita. They were attracted to each other and she was his life saver but she couldn’t disperse the feeling of regret that he felt for his parents. His parents was still his parents, gone by day back by night. His friends had joked whether they were vampires. Rafiq just kept quiet, he hardly brought his friends home. Their work was their life now. They didn’t show any emotion either to Rafi or even to their own parents. It was as if their humanity left the day the baby died. They didn’t show any excitement for Rozita nor did they got involve when he and Rozita got engaged. It was his grandparents that had prepared everything, they had bought the gifts and decorated it to be presented to Rozita’s family on the day of engagement. Rafiq had felt so much love for them and he was devastated when 6 month after his engagement that his grandfather passed away. He had struggled from lung cancer for a long time, it was a blessing that he had succumb to his illness peacefully in his sleep with his beloved wife beside him. It was another blow when his grandmother followed his grandfather 2 month after his death. His mother didn’t even kissed her mother’s face before they covered the body to be buried. His father was always on the phone. If it wasn’t for sweet Rozita, Rafiq would have hit his father. It was on the ride back home from Ipoh that night did he blew up. His mother and Rozita was sitting at the back and his father was at the front passenger seat. He had hissed to his father that he should have showed some respect when they were burying his grandmother or had joined in the prayer ceremony for her instead of talking all the time on his phone. His father had barked that compared to HIM, he had a business to look after and couldn’t drop everything just for a petty thing as that. RAfiq’s relative could have handled it instead of all of them rushing back to her hometown to watch her being buried. Rafiq was already trembling with anger and could feel Rozita’s gentle hand on his shoulder.

 

Rafiq glared at his father. He was so angry that he didn’t hear Rozita shouting to watch out. Too late he saw the big light of the lorry in front of him. The driver was trying to cut the small kelisa in front of him and had gone into Rafiq’s lane. There was a down pour and he didn’t see Rafiq’s light until it was too late  The lorry was going fast. Rafiq tried to avoid it by going off the road and stopped at the shoulder but the lorry was going too fast He felt the impact at the back of the car as he tried into the side o the road and he felt the car spin out of control. The car hit front first into a tree….then there was darkness…..

Soul Asylum Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 

Michael leaned back on the chair. There was a soft beeping sound from the heart monitor. Michael didn’t know why he was spending his day off in the ICU. He always felt agitated if he stayed away too long from his patients especially those that need attention. Michael rubbed his eyes and looked at Rafiq sleeping peacefully. His eyelids were closed but there was eye movement.

     ‘What are you dreaming Rafiq?’ thought Michael. He looked again at Rafiq’s chart . There was nothing abnormal, all his vital signs were fine.

     Maybe he should put Rafiq on the EEG test again. Any height in his dream sequence could lead to a warning for another seizure. Rafiq had been lucky so far, two seizures and no signs of damage to his brain or heart but they could only be sure if Rafiq was awake.

 

Michael remembered the conversation that he had with Sharifah when she wanted to know whether Rafiq’s frontal lobes was damaged causing Rafiq to have continuous dreams. He had told her that there is a possibility Rafiq might not know which is reality. A person in a coma could sense what is going on around him, his brain would still be alert unless he was brain damaged.Probably he was trying to find away to get out. Michael sighed and slid down on his chair. A smile crept at a corner of his mouth. He sounded like Sofia.  

 

That girl really needs a life besides her science fiction and paranormal books. This was the first time that he had met someone who really believe in paranormal psychology and to dwell into the idea as if it would solve their problem……Michael smiled.

 

     Sofia was standing facing him sitting on the stairs. She crossed her arm and looked at Michael with a grim look on her face.

     “There could be a remote possibility to it,” she said stubbornly.

Michael didn’t deny the fact that brains do produce electromagnet energy but to produce the energy into some sort of radio wave and to transmit it to a specific person  was a bit far fetch to him . Sofia in her child like eagerness pointed out that scientist and psychologist didn’t shut the idea of near death experience or out of body experience or the idea of twins able to experience the pain and danger of one another so why couldn’t they believe that dreams are important in interpreting human emotions and have the power to communicate with another person for help when they are in trouble. Micheal interrupted her by saying that RAfiq was not at the verged of death for him to have a near  death experience beside Rafiq never met Sharfiah before.

 

     Sofia sighed trying to prove that there might be something to her idea. Why was it that Rafiq had sudden seizure attacks after when ever Shairfah visits him. Why was it that Sharifah had weird dreams about RAfiq and why was it that even though his body is recovering and there was not indication of damage to the brain, he was still unable to wake up?

 

 She read that in America they had their own lab to test on psi activities where two people were put into two separate places. One was the sender and one was the receiver. The sender was able to send the images presented to him by the tester to the receiver and she was able report what was sent by the sender with accurate detail. Michael had laughed at her idea stating that there was no paranormal activities detected in Malaysia except some supernatural occurrence like ghost or orang bunian or even the last he heard was a lang suey (candy ghost) near UiTM Shah Alam. Oh yes, he mocked saying that there was once a UFO sighting somewhere in the late 90’s at Klang Vally but that turned out as a fluke. Sofia’s face had turned bright red at this and Michael was a bit alarm that she might cry.

 

     “ It is possible that someone can communicate to another person just by thinking of the other person. Come onlah, it is known fact that we only use 10% of out brain who knows what the  other 90% can do. Their like our very own data processor .” Data processor?, she’s going into IT now?’ thought Michael. Why are you doing this? Michael had asked.

 

     “I know that I might be right…..and that if I shouldn’t have turned my back on Sharifah when she said that she was having dreams on Rafiq. I just put it off as a crush and nothing else,” said Sofia looking at the door sadly.

     “Maybe your were right the first time. She has a crush on Rafiq that explains the dreams.”

     “But it didn’t explain why she’s having them whenever Rafiq had a seizure. I want to help my friend.” Michael wanted to say something skeptic but looking at Sofia and how sad she was, he didn’t have the heart.

 

     “Again lets say your right. Why Sharifah? Rafiq never saw her except what you told me they met for a brief moment….in a commuter train…why not Aida where he has a bond with. She’s his cousin and they’ve been close since they were little. Why not her? Sofia just simply shrugged. Her forehead wrinkled, deep in thought…….

 

Michael heard a soft scrapping noise. He looked up to see Aida carrying a chair and putting it beside him.

 

     “You’re not working today, doctor?” asked Aida nodding at his polo T-shirt and denim pants. Michael smiled and shook his head. Aida comfortably sat beside Michael. The two of them didn’t say anything else, they just sat and looked at Rafiq.

 

 

     Sofia took of her prayer clothe off and hanged in on the clothe stand ,she neatly folded the prayer mat. It was already Asar and Sharifah was still asleep. Sofia sat on the floor across from Sharifah leaning on the wall. She took out her International Marketing book, preparing for tomorrows lesson.

     She was half way through the first page when she heard Sharifah mummer something delirious. Sharifah rolled on her left side , her back towards Sofia. Sofia could still hear her mummer. Sofia went to her friend and touched her head, it was hot. Sofia rushed to find a towel and found the dishtowel on the kitchen sink. She quickly wet the towel and rushed back to her friend. Sharifah had rolled to her back facing the ceiling. She was mumbling   and her hands were  raised up front as if she was reaching for something. Sofia was getting worried. She regretted not asking Michael to stay for a while, truth was she wasn’t good at taking care of sick people, normally her mother would do the job if one of her brothers or she herself was sick. She didn’t have what people say a healing touch. Sofia folded the towel into two and put it on her friend’s forehead. Gently as she could without aggravating her friend she lowered both Sharifah’s hand down. Sharifah’s head was moving and right uncomfortably. Her lips were dry but she was mumbling again. Sofia leaned down to hear what she was saying. Her heart was pounding so hard she was afraid that she might get a heart attack. Irnic, sine she was trying to help her friend.

    

 

     “Rafiq.” It was distant but Sofia was sure that was what Sharifah was saying. Suddenly Sharifah grabbed Sofia down pulling Sofia on top of her. Her grip was so strong as if she was holding on for dear life.Noooow, Sofia was petrified. Sofia desperately tried to get away but everytime she tried to struggle the hold got stronger. Sharifah’s face was a mask  fear and pain but her eyes didn’t open. What ever she was dreaming she wasn’t going to let go. This is embarrassing, thought Sofia. With all her strength she pulled herself from Sharifah, without warning Sharifah let go and Sofia was flung backwards. Sharifah was smiling but she wasn’t even looking at Sofia, she  wasn’t even awake.

Sofia distant herself from Sharifah, she didn’t realize that she was trembling until she stood up, her feet was so weak that she had to sit down again.

     “What am I suppose to do?” asked Sofia nearly close to tears.

     “Ok pull yourself together,” said Sofia taking a deep breath. Should she call a bomoh or ustaz? But her friend didn’t seem to be posses. Aaaargh, said Sofia putting both hands at the back of her head. She wasn’t built for emergency cases. She looked at Sharifah.  She was quiet now. No rolling to her side or mumbling. Sofia moved closer to her friend carefully staying far away for any sudden movement. But Sharifah didn’t move. She looked like she was sleeping peacefully. Sofia poked her hand with her friend. “Sharifah,” called out Sofia.

     “Sharifah……….”

     Sharifah opened her eyes …

     The lights….the lights were so bright. Sharifah blinked her eyes. Her vision was coming back to her. She saw the ceiling and the long nylon light above her. She felt something on her right hand. She raised the hand and saw a hospital bracelet on her hand. The writing was small but she could make out her name.

     Not again, thought Sharifah. She could feel the white mattress below her. She grabbed the railing on both side of the bed and pulled herself up. Yes, it was like the first dream. Everything was in white, she was in the same room, there were no windows except a door across from her bed. Sharifah looked at herself and notice that she was wearing a hospital pyjama. Sharifah looked at the other bed expecting Rafiq to be there. The bed was empty.That’s new, thought Sharifah.. She skimmed through the room, which was extremely fast as there was nothing much there , their beds, a night stand beside her bed and next to it was a cupboard, both colored white. Funny, the door was wide open… Sharifah couldn’t see anything at the other side. It was pitch black, quite a contrast form the room. A gust of wind  blew in the room and Sharifah caught a soft sweet smell. It was a pleasant smell. Sharifah turned her body to the edge of the bed. Her feet were dangling a couple of centimeters from the floor. She had remembered the last time she had tried to get off the bed, she had fallen and kept on falling until she woke up. Carefully she put the tip of her left toe on the cold marble floor still clutching to the railing of her bed. It felt solid. Gently her left foot landed on the floor and then put the other feet down on the floor. Sharifah wished she had slippers. The floor felt icy cold. Step by step, she moved closer to the door. The closer she got; the stronger the wind came into the room. Sharifah reached the dor, she still couldn’t see anything but the smell….. it was so sweet. The wind blew on her face inviting her to step inside. Sharifah felt her feet move by itself. One step, two steps … she stepped outside the door. Without warning, the door behind her closed with her feet halfway through the doorway.

    Great, thought Ssharifah. Sshe couldn’t see anything. She tried to search the door behind her. She turned towards where she thought the door was.  Fumbling in the dark. She raised both her hands , trying to touch anything solid in front of her a wall, a door….anything, but she only got empty space. She took the risk to move further. The smell was getting stronger. What she would do to see her arms and feet. Surprisingly she didn’t feel scared….no ‘Arghhh, I’m alone’ feeling or the scary Alfred Hitchcock de ja  vu where you feel that something weird and out of this world would appear in front of you. She was still probing on this when she lost her footing; literally. One minute there was a floor, next she was standing on empty space and then she was falling. The feeling of weightlessness and the fact that she was falling in a pit less hole like Alice in Wonderland did not scare her, what scared her was that the sweet pleasant smell earlier was gone only replaced by the smell of kemenyan. Kemenyan from a benzoin of flower, milk cream in color, used by bomoh to conjure or ward off evil spirits. It was even used by Malays, mashed into dust and spread around the piece of white cloth used to wrap up a body before burying it. Death, was that what’s scaring her ? thought Sharifah. She wasn’t able to think about that longer as she was falling faster. Sharifah tried to grab something to stop her fall, it was hopeless. The farther she fell inside the hole the brighter it became and the slower she fell. She could see her surroundings. It was like she was falling into a long tube with white screens

 

everywhere. There were images on them at each level Sharifah was falling. Each one of them tells a story.

 

A baby given to a man and a women. Sharifah recognized them, they  were Rafiq’s mother and father,  they looked about 20 years younger. Picture shift to a small boy sitting at a dinner table alone with an Indonesian maid trying to feed him some rice form a plate. Shift to the small boy fearfully showing his report card to his father. Sharifah could clearly see the disgust in the father’s eyes as he looked at the red marks. She couldn’t hear what they were saying but she could feel the pain from the boy’s eyes brimming with tears and the guilt expression as he had just let down his parents. The boy just stared at the floor as his parents left the room. There were a lot of sadness, the scene when it was parent teachers day, every students’ parents came to class and  the boy sneak out of the class to wait at the parking lot hoping that either one of his parents would come was heart beaking. Picture shift to the boy playing with a small tomboyish girl, Sharifah couldn’t help smirking, no matter how young she was it was easy to know that the girl was Aida, cute, short curly hair and broad athletic body. It was fun watching them play ‘Galah Panjang’ with the rest of the cousin and at that moment Sharifah could see how happy the boy was. Shift to the time when the boy grew into a teenager and that was the first time he met Rozita.  Sharifah could feel herself falling faster again . The screens were fading as she passed them. Sharifah could see one scene a man arguing with an old man. There was so much anger emulating out of his eyes that Sharifah thought that he was going to hit the old man. That was the last scene that Sharifah saw as she fall faster and the lights were getting brighter until it hurt her eyes. Sharifah covered her eyes. Thump! She hit solid ground with such force that she thought she might have broken all the bones in her body. She carefully got to her feet. She was standing on grass. Sharifah looked up expecting to see the hole that she had fallen from. All she could see was the bright blue sky. It was a bright and sunny day. It should have been peacefully if not the disturbing strong smell of kemenyan. Strong wind was blowing from behind her bringing the smell along. Sharifah turned behind not expecting what she would see. Slowly she turned and then her mouth dropped.

 

 

Sofia got really worried when Sharifah’s body jolted. Sharifah didn’t wake up but lay there, pale and silent. With trembling hands Sofia tried to search for her pulse by placing the tip of her finger at the pulse point on her neck. She couldn’t feel anything. Sofia tried putting the back of her hand near her nose. She could barely feel any air coming out of Shaifah’s nostril.

 

     “Relax Sofia, jangan paranoid sangat,” said Sofia. She bent down to Shairfah’s chest to hear  her heart and could hear a soft and stable thumping. Sofia sighed  and rubbed her eyes.  She looked at he watch. It was 5 in the evening and Sharifah’s housemates were still not  home.

 

     “Please wake up Sharifah,” whispered Sofia laying beside her friend.